D Day

Well, this is it.  The day that all of this being not so on the wagon catches up with me.  I mean, it's not a certainty....but I'm pretty convinced that when I hop on the scale this evening, it will not be smiling back at me. 

And truly, it's no one's fault but my own.  Before I get a round of hate mail, lemme tell ya that I am acutely aware of the consequences of my inoptimal decisions.  I haven't been horrible, but I also haven't been great. This life balance thing has proven to be tough.  And I did NOT leave a life in San Francisco to do anything but be committed to this. 

So...when I meet my fate this evening...I will bitch a lot..and "whoa is me" a bit...and then I will recommit.  To myself.  And to doing what I gave up a whole heck of a lot to achieve.

Crisis Averted

Last week I was an utter workout failure--the gym didn't see my sweaty face for 11 whole days. Yup, I said it.  I did not work out for 11 days straight.  No joke.  No good.

This is not something that I am proud of.  Even a little.  I mean, I coooooould blame my trainer who stranded me by going on a fabulous Turkish vacay for a week.  Or I coooooould blame the new job, or maybe the new guy.  However, no one really is responsible except me.  Sad but true.

Now, this should be the part where I tell ya that karma is a bitch.  That I gained half the weight back, or whatever. 

But get this.  I LOST weight--4.4lbs to be exact.  That puts me at 33 lbs down total.

Can you believe it?!?!?!

That was not 4.4 lbs that I earned.  That 4.4 lbs should have been granted to someone far more deserving.

But it wasn't..and I'll take it...all the way to the gym!

Hallelujah!

I have never been so happy to lose .6 (point 6) lbs in my life.

Lemme tell ya. 

When I stepped onto that scale this morning for the first time in 11 days (shame on me!!!), I was fairly certain that the needle had been inching in the wrong direction. That would have truly devastated me.

Being back into real life the last couple of weeks has been rough--good....but tough.  I am slowly learning to balance and was afraid that my stumbles had set me back.

Fortunately the cosmos seems to be smiling on me.  I have been granted a chance to resume my place firmly on track without having lost ground.

For that, can I get a HALLELUJAH!?!?!

Motivation

The last week or so has been a bit of a bummer for me, as far as resisting temptation goes.

As I may have mentioned, each morning my bed beckons me to stay in it in lieu of a rendezvous with the gymnasio before work.  Last week the bed won five out of seven times.  Ungood.

As I have not yet mentioned, I am dating this great new guy.  And as we explore the city together my old habits of how to fully experience things have a tendency to kick in.  The food choices made this week were not always bad, just not always great either.  Also ungood.

And so, I woke up this morning searching for motivation to make it a better week of staying on track. 

I found that motivation, in the form of an unexpected email from a colleague whom I respect immensely both professionally and personally.  In sharing with me how my quest has impacted him, he helped me relocate my focus and determination.  My motivation intensified his motivation, which in turn rekindled my motivation. 

I guess random events sometimes aren't so random afterall.

Tricky

Alright.  I admit that this whole life change thing whilst working is a bit more challenging than anticipated.

When deciding to take on the new gig, I thought to myself  "all I have to do is wake up at 5am to work out every day--no problem!"

PROBLEM.

Humans should not be awake before the sun (unless hanky panky is involved).  That's the whole purpose of a sunrise--to tell the world that it is time to gear up.  It is utterly unnatural to say good morning before Mother Nature has. 

I firmly believe this.  Yet, this morning I found myself face to face with my trainer before one ray of sunlight had hit the ground.

There is clearly something wrong with this picture.

Hilarity

So, yesterday I got scolded.  By the Weight Watchers leader.  For losing weight too fast.

Now, in all seriousness, I understand the premise--there is a healthy rate at which to lose weight.

It was just kinda a funny scene.  You know, having to keep a straight face while being admonished for being too successful.  I don't think I did that great of a job of not cracking a smile--considering that I was literally almost jumping for joy when the scale reported me down.

And then I surprised myself.  Ya see, you get a token for different milestones--in this case, it was a 25 pounder.  And instead of tossing it into the bottom of my purse, I immediately and proudly affixed it to my keychain.  Yes, me.

So, we're lookin at down 7 lbs for the week--28 total for 10 weeks.  It may be "too fast", but I'll take it.  Particularly as I am learning to balance my new big girl job and the lifestyle change. 

Week 11, here I come!

Riddle Me This...

A few tidbits have dumbfounded me lately......

How is it that I find myself writing a February newsletter for The Chocolate Bar that is all about love, love, love, love and more love, yet I have no Valentine myself.  Bleh.

How is it that I start a new gig (surprise!) and I have 38 emails in my inbox before I even get there.  Lucky me.

How is it that I lost weight on the cruise and my mom gained, yet we ate the same food. Go figure.

How is it that I was EXHAUSTED when I got home from my first day back on the job when the most strenuous part of my day was being on the phone with IT for 3 hours.  Fun!

How is it that the salads at Barnaby's are just so darn good--I'm a total addict.  Scrumptious!

How is it that my last Weight Watchers meeting involved a call and response chant--and I actually did it.  Out of body experience.

And that's where my head is today.....